Out of the Frying Pan

So, I took "gay" off my myspace profile to keep it from flashing advertisements of men with their pants half down and their shirts pulled up, or, worse, mostly naked, lying forward on a bed. I was getting torsos, pecs, and ass cleavage galore.

Geez, MySpace. I sometimes check thee at work.

After I made the switch to "No Answer", I was presented with college-by-mail ads and video game promotions. Score!

Until today, when every single ad was boobs, boobs, boobs.

I seriously can't win. Can I choose "Asexual"?

Overheard at my parents' house...

(Mom, Dad, and I...organize as desired:)

"Who are we rooting for again?"

"Germany."

"Wait, I wouldn't mind Italy."

"They've both won championships, but we're rooting for Germany."

"But there's Italian food."

"Don't you like schnitzel?"

"What's that?"

"Basically pasta." (EDIT: We meant "spaetzle". We didn't know what schnitzel was...I believe it's pork.)

"There're so many carbs there."

"Germany has less carbs, more meat."

"Okay, we'll root for Germany."

"Yeah, any low carb country is fine."